Define "chronic" masturbator.
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
