I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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