what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize