She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
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