is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
