Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
i permit you to call me
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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