naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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