is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
