You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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