I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize