Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
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