see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
