Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?