The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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