Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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