So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
