the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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