You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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