operation harelip BJ is a go
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I would fuck him just for his dog
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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