i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
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I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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