Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society

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(513): View more from Ohio

I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.

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(563): View more from Iowa

She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(240): View more from Maryland

And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

we were pretty classy up until the second keg

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(906): View more from Michigan

last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?

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(714): View more from California

Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.

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