Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize