FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
