His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I think a kid would responsible me up
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
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