Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
The uberlube is also flammable
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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