he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Randomize
