operation harelip BJ is a go
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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