Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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