is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
