that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize