She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
