Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
