if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
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