I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
