The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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