Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize