Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
