she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Randomize
