Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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