fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Randomize
