i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
