I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Randomize
