They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
FUCK WHALES
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
