I love black thongs
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
