the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize