like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
