It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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