wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
