absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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