On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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