The maid of honor just puked.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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